What are the health effects of relationship violence?

Some health effects are clear, like physical injuries. But the stress of relationship violence can lead to other serious problems like:

• Eating disorders
• Depression
• Mental health problems – like panic attacks, trouble sleeping, and flashbacks (re-living the violence in your mind)
• Trouble trusting people and building other relationships
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) – a type of anxiety disorder

How do I know if my relationship might become violent?
Relationship violence can start slowly and be hard to recognize at first. For example, when people first start dating, it’s common to want to spend a lot of time together. It may be hard to tell if you are spending less time with other people just for now or if your partner is trying to control your time.

It might help to ask yourself these questions:

• Does my partner respect me?
• Does my partner blame me for everything that goes wrong?
• Does my partner make most of the decisions in our relationship?
• Am I ever afraid to tell my partner something?
• Do I ever feel forced to do something I don’t want to do?
• Have I ever done anything sexual with my partner when I didn’t want to?
• Does my partner promise to change and then keep doing the same things?

6 Signs of a healthy relationship.

How do I know if my relationship is healthy?

In a healthy relationship, both people:

1. Make decisions
2. Are honest about their feelings and needs
3. Can disagree with the other person without fear
4. Feel supported and respected
5. Have friends and activities that don’t always involve the other partner
6. Believe that there are more good times than bad in the relationship

Healthy relationships have problems, too. But in a healthy relationship, both partners take responsibility for their actions and work together to make decisions and sort out the problems.

In husband and wife relationship, when one spouse runs the house, you have a domestic tyranny. 

When your relationship is headed down the wrong path.

Do you know that having good relationships is an important part of a healthy lifestyle? For some people though, while they fight depression or other mental health conditions, they also have to live with difficult or even abusive and violent relationships.
While it’s not always possible to prevent relationship violence, there are steps you can take to try to protect yourself.

If you think your partner might be controlling or abusive, you can:

• Trust your feelings – If something doesn’t seem right, take it seriously.
• Find out about the warning signs of someone who might become controlling or violent.
• Get help – Talk to people who are experts in relationship violence.

Remember, controlling or violent relationships usually get worse over time. If your partner might be controlling or abusive, it’s better to get help now than to wait.

Relationship violence happens when one person in a relationship tries to control the other person. When people think about relationship violence, they think about physical violence, like hitting or pushing. But people can use other methods to control their partners, like threats.

Relationship violence can include:

• Physical violence, like pushing or throwing things
• Sexual violence, like forcing or trying to force someone to do something sexual
• Threats of physical or sexual violence, which may include threatening to hurt another person or pet
• Emotional abuse, like embarrassing the other partner or keeping that person away from family and friends

If you feel controlled by or afraid of your partner – even if you haven’t been hurt physically – trust your gut. There are people who can help you figure out what to do next.

Stepping out from real depressed to real self expressions.: Feel like there was a curse.

Stepping out from real depressed to real self expressions.: Feel like there was a curse.

Feel like there was a curse.

Thinking a lot lately about how my life has gone on wrong tracks and how I cannot find a way back, I start to think that there must be a curse against me.

Was it the love opponent that took away my boyfriend in the most disgusting ways? Or was it his bitter words that had implanted this curse on me?

Well, I again turn to the internet for answers. I found an article on ehow about that. The author for that article believes in Jesus and advises that four things must be done:

1. First, make a confession of any sin;
2. Repent;
3. Pray for forgiveness, forgive yourself and others; and
4. Forget. 

Well, I'm not that religious but I will take this to heart. I'd say this may work. It works with most situations where hate, jealousy, or any other sins are in involved.

For more, a yahoo user says that a curse only works if you believe in them. While I'd like to think so, but I am only partially agree with this. A curse will certainly work if you keep focus on it. For sure. But sometimes, curses work without you knowing. Because a curse usually works at a very subtle level. It works through your emotions and psychology.

Bula210, a blogger on Wordpress suggests ways to know if you are under a curse. If you experience all these, you're probably under a curse: procrastination, failure, stagnation, lack, sickness and disease, desire to sin even when you don’t want to, poverty etc.

People say that there are different kinds of curse, it can be verbal or emotional. According to  Abd-ru-shin's work, “In The Light of Truth”, The Grail Message, curses as well as blessings can only have effect a person based on his own spirituality standing. 

According to this, a person's spirituality can serve as a shield or barrier against external influences such as curses or blessings. In the case of a curse, if you are spiritually strong, it has very little affect on you. However, if you suffer from spiritual darkness, sins, or fears, then curses will align with these weaknesses and thrive. That sounds really true.

But either way, building on your spirituality will help you exit from a curse. Strong spirit, light in your heart, and courage will help repel evil. 

And one more thing, whether you are superstitious or not, do not seek the aid of wizards or sorcerers to deal with a curse. Their spells produced impure, negative and corrosive radiations which will further attract similar impure and negative forces.

I'd say, be true to yourself and others. Let's go back to being strong and face our life issues courageously. Without fears and no more running away from them.

:) Let's wish us luck!

How to Initiate a Fun and Friendly Conversation

When you come into contact with someone, especially for the first time, you don't have a clue of what they like and dislike, so....what to do if you want to be responded in a positive way or to have a good chat? 

Regardless of your nationality, gender or age, I find some small ways that work for me every time and all the time.

But know that each conversation is a learning experience.

Steps to Take

1. 1
   Get the person's attention through eye contact. If the person is busy with something or someone else, wait until you get eye contact which acknowledges your presence.
2. 2
   Smile: This can be a wide joyous smile or just a small slight tilts of your lips depending on how you feel at the moment. Most people cannot turn down a smile or just a hint of one.
3. 3
   Say something that would cause interest in the person. If you have a favor to ask for example, try to word it in a way that is most receptive to others.If it is someone you know well, start with a topic with mutual interest.
4. 4
   Pace yourself. Do not talk nonstop. If the person starts repeating "uh huh, uh huh, uh huh," it is strong signals that you better change the subject or stop the conversation.
5. 5
   Unless it is a job interview, don't sweat the small details in casual conversations. Whatever goes! As long as both parties stay engaging and enjoying the conversation, it is all good.
6. 6
   End the conversation in a good note. Even if the conversation does not go well, find a generous way to end it. If the conversation is so good that neither of you can stop talking, say something like,"it is so fun talking to you, but hey, I gotta go, will catch up with you soon," can be an acceptable way to end the conversation.

Tips

• When someone does not like how you appear or how you approach them, their faces show a signs of sternness, hard face, or even hostility. They also tend to dart their eyes pass you quickly and avoid eye contact.
• Hints that the person want to stop the conversation: They starts to repeat short remarks like "ok" or "uh huh" or "alright" or their eyes wander away while talking to you.

Article is read almost 1,000 times at wikihow

How to Break the Abusive Cycle

What is it like to have an abusive husband? Many people compare it to an obsession or addiction of some kind. The wife knows the bad side of this relationship yet there is something drawing and keeping her in. 

Why? Because a husband, that is although abusive, is otherwise a wonderful man, in fact in some ways he is more wonderful and exceptional than many men out there. Except, he is abusive to the wife. 

His woman usually would come back when he shows those wonderful sides of himself. 

Is it bad to be tempted by one's husband?
No, of course not. But like any problem people get themselves into, they have to learn the necessary skills to overcome adversaries. Since women usually are reluctant to leave their abusive husbands, experts in the area of spousal abuse are thinking of new ways to help these women. Instead of continuing to convince them that they shouldn't return to the men they love so deeply, there are things that can be done.

Steps that can help you out.

1

1) Don't let yourself relive the times you felt hurt. Learn new ways to treat the man you love so that it brings out the best in have. There is no wrong or right. It's all about love. Use your feelings. Anything you do, but do not go through the abuse again.

2) Know that he has abusive tendencies and habits that even himself does not realize or can control. He has not changed because all this time, he doesn't see it as abuse. His actions are generally triggered beyond his will.

3) Know that the control is better left in your hands than his. Do not try to reason at length with him.

4) Know that most abusive men won't admit their faults until long after their women left them. 


______________________________________________________________________

It may be better if you don't return. But if you do, make the best choices for your relationship. Create a new beginning that brings you a constructive and loving relationship with your spouse.

Obituary to my Fellow Man

Trailing Behind
I See You, Someone
Being Carried
In That Long Bed Car.

My Mind Sings Lowly,
"God Bless You."
So, You are Done Here On Earth
With the Things You've Come To Do.

Done With Growing Up
Done With Standing Tall
Done With Looking Large
Done With Feeling Small.

Done With Standing Out
Done With Fitting-In
Done Fulfilling Your Needs
Done Seeking What You Want.

Done With Finding Out
Done With Searching On
Done With Testing Out
Done Being Disappointed.

No More Pleasing Others
No More Pleasing Yourself
It Is Time To Go
Go!

You Came Like a Star
Now Burnt Out In Those Same Light
There has Been No Success
Nor There Been Any Failure.

One Sure Thing and
It's Apparent, That
Your Journey Is Complete
Finished or Interrupted, You Made It.

Be Pleased! And Farewell To You!!
Others Sure Will Miss You, and
Grieve In Your Departure, And
Until Then